Isn’t today summer solstice ?

At least now I can think bit straight.  That two kaya butter toast, and savoury salty taste of butter (that health conscious like me miss) , is nothing less than heavenly. Coffee is below average, but will sustain my diurnal caffeine habits.

The point running in my mind is

  • Am I wasting my time ? Where is the fucking dent that I gonna make in the universe ?
  • Should I travel to London again ? Now that I know name of at least 3 Burroughs, thanks to Assassins creed game.  Lambeth, London City, Westminster, Whitehall. But the visa lasts 5 more months and tickets are around 1000 bucks.
  • I guess the pricing takes travelling to London , out of equation. Sigh. Some clarity in life.
  • The gym hours ! Where is the promised core, it is there I tell you, you just need to do chipping like Michelangelo did for his initial sculptures. Meh.
  • I think the current countenance of mind , can be blamed on the inheritance of a loss, the book is not exactly gloomy, but it is not a happy one too.

 

On indoor climbing day #5

  day #5
Climbed all small auto belays, except black 6b and Green 6b

Tried full wall red auto belay
gave up 3 more holds from top

Bouldering :
– Tried black one again, foot stepping is bad and very amateurish
– Tend to get both legs on same hold
– Difficulty switching between legs when going up
– Still using too much upper body
– Need more flexibility with legs
– Include rests ?? [http://www.rockandice.com/rock-climbing-training/attack-and-defend-tips-for-resting-rock-climbing]

Longing…

He closed his eyes, and all the universe started
contracting. Like someone pressed rewind and everything was rushing back to big
bang days.

 

  An electric impulse went off, up his spine. Somewhere behind
the stage of his mind, his to-do list was waiting to make an appearance. 

He wanted to chuck work, and head to Indie film theatre in
island. All his recent cinema trips, were marked by stupid,  abysmal movies. Even much awaited Amitabh
Bacchan and Farhan , on screen shenanigans with 64 squares of chess failed to
impress him. As Raja Sen said it was meant to be a thriller, but somewhere the
scriptwriter forgot that, and audience were left with longing and hope that
something will happen now, and will give movie that oomph character that they
paid for. 

Now the cinephile in him longed for good old Godfather on
a big screen. 

Myth of Sisyphus 

Rising,tram, 4 hours in the office or factory, meal, 4 hours of work, tram, meal, sleep and Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday according to the same rhythm. This path is easily followed most of the time.

But one day the ‘why’ arises, and everything begins in that weariness tinged with Amazement.

‘Begins’ this is important, weariness comes at the end of mechanical life but at the same time it inaugurates the impulse of consciousness.it awakens consciousness and provokes what follows.

What follows is the gradual return into the chain or it is the definitive awakening.

– Camus, The myth of Sisyphus 

Other days he would have given himself apt reason to smile at himself, the narcissistic one. And may be even pat himself for where he has come to.

The smile spread across his image from back window of rented uber, and he tried to remember when did he swipe right, rather than a bored non-chalant left. Or perhaps in desperation of getting his probability corrected. He was some sort of competitive now, but he always hated that feeling of being on the losing side.

Through the sad sordid days of getting drunk and barfing, to seclusions sought in lonely mountains. The mountains echoed his thoughts and empathize with him that he wasn’t alone in his longing. 
He happily remembered walking under the shadow of colosseum proud of himself for having seen it. And then when he travelled back, it was another old Monument. Like that in Sarnath from his hometown. For having so used to, it lost its significance. 
He held on to his soul, reading it in ikea lamp yellow light. It was still there, alive and happy after so many days. Still young.He would have made Pindar proud for sure 
“o my soul, do not aspire to immortal life, but exhaust the limit of the possible

Trippy with Beatles

Trippy
Lucy shudnt be in the sky
With diamonds
I picture myself in a train
In a station
But it’s urban utopia
Or dystopia
Tired face
Tired of their monotonous
Job
Lifestyle
Show me some spark man .

She is not a girl
Who misses much
Holland village
Remnants of boozing at bar
That fine Japanese
Single malt .

What is happiness
Arre it’s a warm gun rey

And now blackbirds
Are flying
How I missed them
Ob la di
Ob la da

Miners of Kawah Ijen

10254044_10152365062793529_8381213138107099218_nTwo days back into the civilisation, first world country. He was tying his boots – getting ready for diurnal commute to place with cubicles. When realisation hit him, that while he was living in upscale apartment with pretty much all the modern facilities, a miner back there would be heaving and bulging under the weight of ninety kilograms, and to earn meagre. While he would lie back on easy chair, with air-conditioning and coffee brewed in a french press. There was a stark juxtaposition. He felt deluded and disillusioned, and a sheer respect for the miners back there.

A miner would climb up with impossible 90kgs on his shoulder and budging under the weight of sulphur , with a torchlight and scarf in his mouth. It was beyond comprehension for a normal city dwellers to understand  the challenger and risk these folks took, for 700 rupiah per kilogram of sulphur. And a days’ labor worth of 5-6 usd. He was discussing this with miner’s family at the house in kampung. His father was a miner and so was his elder brother. They would trek daily up the Mount Ijen and descend down 800 metres into the crater. Brave poisonous sulphur fumes, wait for the red molten sulphur cool down as yellow crystals, and then break it with a rod, fill in the bamboo basket and then carry the onerous ninety kilograms up and above, followed by three kilometres descend. They would weigh the load at intermediate stop, and finally deliver it to the factory. And make 49,000 IDR – 63000 IDR(4.9 – 6.3 USD).

Younger brother, Ganda,  attended college in nearby university at Surabaya, and studied physics. He took 5 years to finish the course, compared to usual 4 years and soon realised that it wasn’t his mettle. He started off as developer in a Chinese software firm, and tried to stick for 4 months. Then with the advent of technology he started seeing tourism growing in east Java. It was when he listed his place on airbnb and started getting guests, 5-6 a month. He made a decent website with his HTML skills, and later realised that wordpress plugin was much better to manage. Now he gets a monthly influx of 4-5 tourists and charges around 45 USD for 2 days stay, with breakfast et al, trip to rice paddy, coffee plantation and then trekking up to kawah ijen. Samsul helps him with his business.

Still Ganda faces some inherent business issues, for one, airbnb pays a lump sum at $600, and t
o accumulate that much amount takes a bit long with the conversion rate of Indonesian rupiah. Initially when he started off his village (Kampung) folks were not very conductive of the idea, and complained about the presence of foreigners flocking around. But as on april 2014, the villagers now mingled freely, laughed together and conversed in broken english. It must have been a liberating experience for Ganda.

For folks who wanna go there, or are planning to here are the weblinks.

Website http://www.ijenminertour.com/

Fb page https://www.facebook.com/ijenminertour

Airbnb link https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/1697023?s=OJUR

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many men- unfortunately aren’t anything

Of those fifty guys in the room, probably fifteen of them thought they were writers. Almost everybody used words and could write them down , i.e., almost everybody could be a writer. But most men, fortunately, aren’t writers or even the can drivers, and some men – many men- unfortunately aren’t anything.

-Bukowski
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